


Never Fall In Love With A Gallagher

by starksparker



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Ending, Angst, Childhood Friends, Drinking, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Physical Abuse, Protective Ian Gallagher, Protective Lip Gallagher, Rape Recovery, Recovery, Sad Ending, Smoking, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-19 02:50:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13695339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starksparker/pseuds/starksparker
Summary: Lip's childhood best friend is back from the Northside. Most people want to get out of the Southside but not River. She wants to come back, for good.





	1. Welcome Back?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zinny](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zinny/gifts).



> I originally posted this on Wattpad well over a year ago and I'm finally re-editing it and making an alternate ending so I decided to go ahead and post it here as well.

Five years doesn't seem like a long time. It's just half a decade, a mere tenth of your life. But as River stood on the steps of a familiar Chicago home, five years suddenly seemed to be forever. Five years can change people. River knew that better than anyone. She's changed. She's not the same person she was when she left the Southside. She raises her arm and knocks nervously on the worn door. She hadn't knocked there in ages. Even while River lived in the neighborhood, she never needed to knock. This was becoming all new to her again.

As she stood and waited, hoping someone would be home, she took notice in the home two doors down. A smile came across her face at the thought of the couple that lived there. Kev and Vee were basically another family to River. River considered herself rather lucky. She had three families when she lived on the Southside.

River fiddled with the lighter she held in her hand. Nerves flowed through her as if she had never met these people before. She was about to leave when she heard the door open, causing her to turn around and see a tall, dark-haired woman. River smiled wider than she had in a long time. The woman didn't look a bit different at all, making River feel all the more comfortable.

"Oh my god." The familiar face gasps as she pulls a now excited River into her arms, shutting the door behind her.

"Hey, Fiona." River says with a grin as wide as her face.

"How are you? You look amazing. When did you get back? Oh my god." Fiona says all in one breath, excitement fueled in her words.

"I'm good." River laughs at the woman who was once viewed as the older sister she always wanted. "I got back yesterday. But hey, not to cut this short 'cause fuck knows I've missed the hell outa ya, but um...is Lip home?" River hesitates asking, hoping she doesn't sound rude for cutting the reunion very short. She loves Fiona as if she were her own sister but the one person she's been dying to see is Lip, her once best friend.

"Yeah." Fiona smirks as she points upstairs.

Fiona always thought Lip and River would end up together. The smirk was a usual response whenever River had asked for Lip.

River climbs up the stairs, noticing they aren't full of things like she remembered them to be. It's small, but it's a reminder that even the little kids have grown up in five years, even little Liam. Toys, clothes, shoes, all of it used to clutter the staircase but now it's almost completely tidy.

Not once had she ever been nervous to see Lip but here she was, heart pounding, blood rushing, palms sweating. She missed him more than anything and she hoped he missed her, too.

She made her way down the hallway and to the boys' room. River saw Ian laying on his bed reading a magazine while Carl was atop the bunk bed staring at the ceiling. River's jaw nearly drops at the site of them. Ian's hair was lighter and much shorter. His freckles weren't as prominent as she remembered them to be. Even laying down, she could tell he was much taller. Carl had longer hair now and didn't look like some little twirp her and Lip would mess with. He was growing up, just like she had witnessed and grown with the other Gallaghers.

"Holy shit." Ian says as he notices River standing in the doorway.

"Hey." River waves lightly, knowing he was just as surprised to see her as she was him.

"What're you doing here? I thought you'd always be on the Northside." Ian says as he gets up and embraces his friend in a close hug.

River can't let her smile fall when Ian hugs her. She loved Ian's hugs almost more than anyone's.

"Here here or Southside here?" River asks, knowing there's a different answer depending on Ian's question.

"Both?" Ian raises his eyebrows as if to be surprised.

"Moved back to my old house down the street. But I'm here to see Lip actually and the rest of you fucking Gallaghers." A laugh escapes her curved lips as the last word leaves her mouth. She didn't just miss Lip. She missed everyone, even Liam who was still just a baby when River moved to the Northside.

"Lip is in Frank's old room." Ian gives River a similar look to the one Fiona gave her downstairs causing River to roll her eyes before raising her eyebrows. Last she knew, Frank still had a room. "Don't ask."

"Wasn't gonna. I'll catch ya, yeah?" She knew better than to ask a bunch of questions when it came to Frank. No one ever knew what he was doing, not even Frank.

"Yeah, yeah. Go see Lip." Ian hugs River before she can leave.

She walks to what was Frank's room. There he is. His hair is a little longer, a little messier and his jaw a little more defined but other than that, he pretty much looks the exact same. River's heart skips a beat as she observes the boy, not quite wanting to break his concentration on his textbook. Lip Gallagher was holding a textbook. A college textbook. That was something River didn't think you could pay Lip to do. But with a textbook in one a hand, a lit cigarette was in the other. That much hasn't changed.

"You still smoking a pack a day or are you done trying to kill yourself?" River teases him as she leans against his doorway.

Lip looks up to her and his eyes widen like a deer in headlights. River knew by the look he was giving her that he'd never expected to see her again but here she was, right in his doorway, teasing him like she did time and time again.

"Fucking shit." Lip says, his jaw agape. He puts his still lit cigarette into the ashtray and rushes to River.

He pulls her into a hug and River openly embraces him. She loved Ian's hugs. They were sweet and cute, warm and fuzzy but Lip's hugs were a whole other ballpark. They were strong and rough while still being the most comfortable thing the world could offer but, above all that, there has always been a safety in Lip's hugs. A sort of safety River couldn't find anywhere else.

Lip pulls away and cups her face, locking his bright blue eyes with her mismatched eyes. One was dark blue while the other was a soft green, both of which having small specks of yellow. It was something Lip had always poked fun at. Her eyes were different and rare. Lip just liked to poke fun at any bit of her that would be considered different, just like she did with him. However, she couldn't poke fun at his eyes as much as she wanted to. They aren't blue like oceans or lakes but blue like the sky on a December morning, right after a heavy snowfall. His eyes alone lit up the darkest rooms.

As minutes seemed to tick on, River found her voice again as a smirk washed across her face. "I swear if you kiss me Lip Gallagher, I will kick your fucking dick."

"Fuck off!" Lip nods his heads, filling the room with his enticing laugh.

Before any other words can be exchanged, he pulls River onto his bed, grabbing a new cigarette and leaning against the wall, the window directly behind him. River sits right next to him as she steals a cigarette from his red and white pack, Lip lighting it for her as he did hundreds of times before. Lip wasn't the only one that always had a cigarette in his hand.

"Okay, when the fuck did you come back?" Lip takes a drag from his cigarette before letting the smoke escape his lungs. "How long are you staying?" He scratches his forehead with the tip of his thumb.

"I got back yesterday," River repeats for the third time. She slightly regrets not calling at least Ian to say she'd be back that way she wouldn't have to repeat herself to the entire Gallagher clan. "I'm not sure how long I'm staying," she shrugs her shoulders as she takes a long drag of the nonmenthol cigarette. Lip's expression makes the slightest change, almost as if he were disappointed by her words. "I moved into my old house," River confesses and watches Lip's expression go from disappointed to surprised in nanoseconds. His reaction time was impressive in everything he did.

"No shit?" He furrows his eyebrows, more smoke escaping his lungs.

"Yeah," River answers with a sigh, knowing he'll follow that with more questions. "Went up last week and when I saw it listed, I bought it."

"Why?"

"I thought about moving back a few times but I didn't want to if it wasn't going to be there," River explains her reasoning which she knows Lip will call her bluff.

It was her childhood home and she missed it, she wasn't lying there. It was the house right down the street from the Gallaghers. If it weren't for that house, she wouldn't have the memories she did or the friends she had while living on the gritty side of the Windy City. River feels like she owes something to the house.

"Well, why're you here?" Lip pushes for more answers.

Lip wasn't one to leave a stone unturned when it came to River. Maybe that was because River would tell Lip anything if he asked the right way or asked enough times. She had a hard time saying no to him. Always has and always will.

"Missed my favorite past time of fucking with ya," River giggles as Lip shakes his head. Lip made it too easy for her to mess with him.

"Missed ya fucking with me," Lip mocks back, as the two of them put their cigarettes out. She knows he's joking but she also knows Lip did actually miss her even if he'll never say it.

"Is that so?" River sparks an idea as she says the words in a whisper, coming too close to Lip's face. His breath is warm on her skin and the longer she lingers next to him, the quicker his breath becomes. A playful smirk comes across her face and she cocks her right eyebrow. "Never gonna happen." She whispers again before pulling away, laughing at the sight of Lip's face, clearly annoyed at the teasing she inflicted intentionally. She knew how to get under Lip's skin with fun and she knew of all things, that wouldn't change.

Lip's reaction took no time. He had River pinned on his bed in seconds. His legs on either side of her with his arms holding hers to the bed. "You're a fucking tease."

"I'm not a tease. You're just fucking easy," River retorts as she wiggles her eyebrows.

She wasn't a tease unless it came to Lip. But she really only teased him because he was easy and he never got mad or expected anything. It was always just fun with the two of them. That's what held their inseparable friendship together before she moved.

"Really?" Lip inches closer to River's face. His biceps flex as he puts all his weight onto her arms, making sure he gets as close to her mouth as he can without actually touching her.

Lip lingers as River's heart races. This wasn't the first time they ended up like this and whenever it did happen, River seemed to melt under Lip's touch. There was something about him that always got to her. He seemed to know that, too. He moved down her neck and started nibbling and kissing as River moved her neck to the side to give him more access. River couldn't help but close her eyes in pleasure and just as she did that, Lip moved back to her face, an arrogant smile slapped across his face.

"You're a slut," River bites her bottom lip before curling her mouth into a smile.

"We're all addicted to something," The arrogant smile turns to a devilish grin as he sits on her legs and tickles her sides. As a laugh forcefully escapes her mouth, her face winces in pain momentarily. River instantly feels guilty for not being able to control her expression as she knows Lip noticed. "Fuck is that about?"


	2. GFY

"Fuck is that about?" The mood shifts immediately as Lip freezes, his face becoming hard.

"Nothing," a soft smile comes onto River's face.

 It was the smile she used whenever she needed to lie to Lip. It was rare but there were times she needed to lie. It was usually because of a cone of silence she had with Ian. Ian told Lip everything but sometimes, he'd tell River first. Lip seemed to remember what the smile meant or maybe River just lost her touch because he didn't believe her for a second. His eyes moved from hers to the hem of her shirt where his hand was resting.

"Don't," Her voice was no longer sweet. It was threatening and full of anger. River adored Lip more than anyone but she'd stand up to him without hesitation.

Lip lifts the side of River's shirt to reveal a black bruise and a few deep cuts, deep enough where she probably should have seen a doctor rather than just using butterfly stitches but that's a lot of money. Now, Lip has seen River beaten up quite a few times but this was different. They're older now. They aren't teens. Not to mention, whenever River was injured, she always showed Lip, mainly because it was typically a black eye or a bloody nose, a fat lip. These were side injuries, something she never wanted anyone to see.

"I'll kill him," Lip clenches his jaw as he looks back at River's sad eyes.

"Lip," River sighs as Lip moves off her legs and examines her side better.

He runs his fingers over the cuts, making River flinch with the first touch. She hates admitting she's in pain. She grew up with Gallaghers. Pain was nothing.

"No, fuck with that. Who the fuck did it?" Lip's face was nearly turning red as he grew more and more angered the longer he looked at River's injured body.

"No one. Calm the fuck down," River finally stops him and yanks her shirt down. "I jumped a fence," River holds a straight face, analyzing Lip's.

"Yeah?" Lip nods his head, sure River is lying. "Didn't know fences leave shoe prints now," He spits back as he pulls her shirt up again, tracing a boot outline.

Lip seemed to have this thing about River where no matter what, he'd protect her just like he did with his siblings. Lip was the first person she ever punched. He wanted to make sure her right hook was good enough. The black eye that lingered a few weeks signified it was.

"I'm fine, Lip," She pulls her shirt down again but giving a side smile, full intention of calming him down.

"I find out who did this, they're fucking dead. You hear me?" Lip says through gritted teeth as he moves off of the bed and into the hallway, leaving River alone.

River doesn't lay for long before following Lip down to the kitchen. She sees Debbie sitting at the table with a few pieces of toast. Shock consumes her as she looks at the now teenager. Debbie isn't the little adorable girl she once knew.

"Hey, Debbie," River flashes a smile at the teenager and her jaw drops at the sight of her brother's best friend.

"River!" She jumps up and gives River a hug and River hugs back, all too happy to see her again.

Debbie was different than the other Gallaghers but it was a good different. She basically looked at Debbie like a little sister and missed her just as much as the other Gallaghers.

"Welcome back! Fiona said you were but you were with Lip," Debbie continues her excitement.

"Oh yeah, had to see Lip, ya know," River laughs as she glances at Lip who was gulping orange juice from the carton.

"Alright," Lip wipes his mouth before putting the carton back in the fridge. "I'm off but hey, stop by tonight, yeah?" Lip half asks but doesn't leave enough time for River to answer before grabbing his coat and leaving the house.

"Where's he off to so quick?" River questions the younger sister as she takes a seat.

"School, probably," Debbie says nonchalantly.

"He really is in college, huh?" River wrinkles her forehead. She's surprised but proud. Lip deserves college.

"Yeah," Debbie gives a wide smile, clearly proud of her older brother. "Mandy sent in the application and he got in."

"Always liked Mandy," River laughs at the thought. They two girls weren't close by any means but they never disliked each other.

"Hey, I'm gonna head to the Alibi, wanna come?" Ian asks as he comes down the stairs.

"Sure, Kev and Vee still there?"

"Of course," Ian laughs and grabs his coat before the two say bye to Debbie.

River missed the Alibi. It was a run-down bar that probably should have been closed years ago but somehow managed to stay afloat. It was a piece of her that she had to leave behind. Going back, she knew it'd fill a part of the missing puzzle pieces.

Ian and River walk to the Alibi and head into the warm building, a bell signaling the moving door. A tall woman with short hair was behind the bar. She didn't look familiar to River which just confused her. She almost expected the same people to always work there.

"Svetlana, can we get two beers?" Ian asks as the pair take seats at the bar.

"Who is girl I never see before?" She questions Ian with a thick Russian accent.

"I'm River. Used to live down the street from the Gallaghers," River explains, holding a sweet smile as Svetlana slides them their beers, taking their money in return.

"Is that River Kavanagh?" River hears a familiar female voice causing her to smile ear to ear.

"Vee!" River yells as she gets up and hugs the taller woman. She hadn't changed even the slightest bit. Vee was just at gorgeous as ever.

"What are you doing back here?" Shock and slight disappointment seem to take over her voice. It was something River expected. If you're lucky enough to get out of the Southside, you stay the fuck out but here River was.

"Don't belong on the Northside," River takes a drink of her beer, making sure to avoid eye contact in hopes Vee won't push for more answers.

"You and Lip are still the  _exact_  same, huh?" Kev says with a sigh as he comes from the side of the bar, overhearing River's words. His tone was angered but not surprised. But, what did her being like Lip have to do with her being back on the Southside?

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You got out. Why come back?" Kev avoids her question with another.

River was missing something and it seemed to be staring her right in the face. She didn't miss things often but there was something not quite right.

"Had to," she takes another drink, trying to think of a way to change the subject. "Thought I'd be missed a little," she changes her tone to sarcastic and cocky, something she did regularly. Ian shakes his head with a laugh as he sips his beer, almost like he expected her to come back with sarcasm.

"We do," Vee smiles, dropping the subject. She pours a few shots before continuing. "Welcome back, River," River smiles as she downs her shot, the burning sensation filling her throat but she doesn't budge. She was used to burning by now.

"So, what's up with Svetlana?"

"Oh, well you see," Kev says as he leans his elbows onto the bar. "She's pretending to be married to Vee."

River looks at Ian who is trying to hold back his laughter. Last River heard, Mickey was married to someone named Svetlana, she assumed this was her. Now she's just confused. Sometimes things aren't really drama, they just get weird.

"I don't wanna know," River laughs, taking another drink of her beer that's seemed to become a little bit of crunch.

"Lip know you're back?" Vee changes subject again, knowing how close the two were when she lived down the street.

"Yeah, hung out for a bit."

"Good, I know he's missed you," Vee gives her sincere smile.

The smile brought River back to when her and Lip had their first fight. River was devastated. She was seeing this guy, which was something small considering the young age but Lip didn't like him. River, being River, refused to stop talking to the boy so Lip ignored her the rest of the day. She went straight to Vee and Vee promised Lip would cave by the next day. She was right. Later that night, Lip showed up wanting River to come burn some of Frank's clothes as payback for ditching them again.

"Well, I gotta get to work. Wanna come?" Ian offers as he removes himself from his seat.

"Nah, I'm just gonna head back home. I'll stop by the house later," River gets up and heads to the door with Ian.

The two say their goodbyes and head their opposite directions. She may have just gotten back but she felt more at home now than she ever did on the Northside. These people were more than just people. They were her family. Her parents might be her biological family but the people here were so much more. That's not to say she had a bad home life because she didn't. Her parents worked hard and took care of her. They were there when she needed them. But there was always something her parents didn't understand but the Gallaghers and Kev and Vee did.

River makes her way to her childhood home and sees a red sports car in the driveway. She knows the car all too well and thinks for two seconds that maybe she could just make a quick v-line to the Gallaghers and avoid her house but that wouldn't help. It would make the problem worse.

She gets to the driver's side as a tall male gets out, just as she knew he would. Regret streams through her veins. She shouldn't have come back. It was a bad decision. She knows running away from her problems will cause more. That's why Jason is here, to cause more problems. River hoped that Jason wouldn't bother with the Southside knowing it's rough reputation but she was dead wrong.

"Have fun with trash friends?" Jason slams his door, causing River to step back.

"How'd you find me?"

River never brought him to her old house or even told him the neighborhood. Her parents wouldn't have told him seeing as they never liked Jason. That alone should have been the red flag but teens rebel and think their parents are always wrong. River was no different despite her book and street smarts.

"Your phone," Jason gains a sinister grin as he holds up a location app on his phone; a software Jason installed on her phone to make sure she was where she said she was.

She just wanted to kick herself for forgetting about it but she couldn't exactly just dump her phone. She would need to keep in touch with her parents.

"Why are you here?" he clenches his jaw angerly as he seems to grow more impatient.

"I don't know," River gives a half honest answer. She was there to get away but that wasn't the whole story.

"Hey," Jason grips River's arm tight enough to start cutting the circulation off, inflicting pain. "You listen to me."

"I just wanted to visit old friends."

"Bullshit!" Jason yells, raising his hand and slapping River with all his strength. Her head jerks left with the impact causing not only her face but her neck intense pain.

"Well, I did," she retorts, ignoring the stinging.

She knows it's not her smartest decision to stand up to Jason but if she didn't, he would stay and she'd rather him do what he was going to do than stay.

"Let's go," he grips her hair and drags River inside.

He pushes River to the floor and she tries to get back onto her feet but he's too quick for her. His fist comes down to her face and she screams in pain, attempting to fight back. He was much bigger than her and stronger. But this time, she was fighting back. River moved her legs as much as she could to try and get him off her but that only made Jason angrier. His fist comes down and collides with her face again and again and again as River's tongue fills with the taste of iron.

"Are you going to listen now?" Jason stops momentarily as River's ears ring.

"G..f...y," she spits the blood from her mouth as the phrase she picked up from Lip falls from her mouth.

"What?" Jason grabs her shoulders and slams her against the floor, causing River's head to spin.

"Go fuck yourself," she spits but this time directly into his face. She figures she has nothing left to lose.

"You really have a death wish, don't you?" Jason snarled before pulling his fist back again causing River's world to turn black.


	3. Running Into Walls

Hours passed since River was last hit. She doesn't how long she was out after Jason hit her. It was bright outside when she went inside but the sun was going down by the time she woke up. By her estimates, it was probably the longest she had been knocked out but she picked herself up and moved to the kitchen, getting herself alcohol. River pours herself drink after drink until the sun goes down. By that time, the pain from her face was masked from the incredible buzz. 

Alcohol wasn't the best way to handle things but it was what she was best at. For a reason she'll never know, River decides going to the Gallagher house would be a good idea. But not for Lip, for Ian. Lip would flip over her face just by his reaction to her side. Nonetheless, River needed someone to make her feel better and Ian would be that person.

River made sure to leave her phone at home. She was intoxicated but not stupid intoxicated. She got to the Gallagher's and knocked on the front door. Carl opened it and walked away so quickly, there's no way he took notice at who was at the door and it didn't seem like he cared much. River took that as a cue to just walk in which wasn't too unusual for the Gallagher home.

"Ian here?" Her words slur more than she expected.

"Upstairs; fuck happened to your face?" Carl asks as he turns from the tv.

"Ran into a pole," River smirks the best she can before stumbling up the stairs. She was never very good at walking up stairs when she was drunk.

She walked down the seemingly long hallway and into Ian's room where he was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. She plopped herself down, leaning her head against the window.

"What the hell happened to you?" Ian asks as he sits up.

"Ran into a door," River laughs as she pulls out her pack of cigarettes with a lighter.

"Bullshit. Seriously, what happened?" Ian adjusts himself to take a better look at River's face as she places the cigarette into her mouth.

"Don't sweat it. It's nothing. How was work?" She switches subject as she takes a long drag from the much-needed cigarette. River appreciates Ian's concern but she doesn't want to talk about it, especially when she's too drunk to really comprehend much.

"Uh, it was good," Ian stumbles on his words with raised eyebrows.

"That's good," Rivers nods and gives a smile before taking another long drag.

"Are you drunk?" Ian asks but by the tone of his voice, River knows she doesn't really have to answer. Ian already knows.

"Maybe," River lets out another laugh followed by a hiccup. The color drains from her face as she knows what's coming. "I...am not okay," she puts her cigarette out and runs to the bathroom, just making it before she started emptying her stomach into the toilet.

River gags as the alcohol comes rushing back up and tears fill her eyes. Her throat burns, her face hurts, her stomach is cramping worse than it has in ages. She was not in as good of shape as the alcohol made her feel. Ian, being the person he is, came into the bathroom and held River's black hair back until she had finished emptying her once full stomach.

"Come on." Ian grabs her arms, causing her to flinch.

Her face was too sore to realize her arms weren't in much better shape. Ian eyes her but knows better than to ask questions after she's just been sick.

"I'm just gonna go home," she mumbles as she tries to escape Ian's grip.

"No. You're staying here," Ian walks her into his room and grabs her pajama pants that were too long for her and a t-shirt. "I'm gonna go get you water and you're gonna change," Ian's voice is stern.

River didn't listen to many people. She could always handle herself and knew what was best but Ian wanted to help and she was tired. Maybe the thing she needed most was a night spent at the Gallagher home.

River changes into the pajamas Ian left her. They smelled like him which she liked. Ian always smelled good. Lip smelled of cigarettes more than anything but Ian smelled of strawberry shampoo and deodorant with just a touch of nonmenthol cigarettes. She laid down on Ian's bed, not quite sure where she'd actually be sleeping or how she'd explain anything to Lip. He didn't intimidate her but Lip had a temper; a temper made worse when it came to people he actually gave a shit about.

"Here's some water," Ian says as he hands River the glass. "Lip's home, you want me to get him?" Ian asks as he sits next to her.

He could hide his worry if he wanted but he chose not to. It was written all over his face that he was worried about his friend and knew Lip would know how to handle her better. Ian and River were close, closer than one would think but her and Lip got each other better in ways where words didn't even need to be said. The understood in silence.

"No," she says plainly as she takes a sip of water. Ian sighs as he shakes his head. River knows he wants to tell him regardless of what she says. "Don't," she pleads.

"Fine," Ian throws his hands out, frustrated. "I'm telling him you're here but you're asleep. Deal?"

"Deal," River makes the deal.

She didn't want to risk him telling Lip that she was awake even if she  _was_  barely awake. Obviously, the bruises and cuts would be impossible to hide but talking about her injured state while intoxicated would just be a lost cause. Ian gets that but Lip would be persistent.

"Go to bed," Ian nods his head. "I'll take the couch," Ian says before going to exit the room.

"Hey, Ian?" River says, causing him to turn around. "Thank you," Ian gives her a half-cocked smile before leaving her to sleep.

* * *

River wakes up with her head pounding. The room is spinning but it starts to come to a standstill as River places her feet on the floor. She read once that placing your feet on the floor will remind your brain that you're not actually spinning.

She gets up with the glass of water in hand and goes to the kitchen where she assumes the rest of the Gallaghers would be. Sure enough, Fiona and Ian were by the counter, getting themselves ready for their day.

"What the hell happened to you?" Fiona asks as she drops what she was doing to look at River's face. Fiona grabs her chin to lift her face into the light.

"Long story," River mumbles as Fiona releases her fingers. She receives a funny look and looks to Ian who just nods.

"Well, okay. Stop by Vee, okay? Have her make sure you're good. I'll be home late," Fiona says before leaving out of the front door.

River sits at the table, her back facing the back door. She places her throbbing head into her hands, hoping her headache will disappear or her face will stop hurting. Anything that eases a little pain.

"You okay?" Ian asks, not moving from his place by the counter.

"Yeah, hungover," River doesn't lift her head as she mumbles the words.

"Not what I was asking," Ian's words are laced with annoyance.

"I know. You tell Lip?" She switches away from her pain as she realizes Lip is probably home and she'll be facing him sooner or later. A silence comes over the two of them which causes River to lift her head. "Fucking kidding me?"

"What'd you want me to say?" Ian places his hands on the counter to defend his stand.

"I don't know," River bites back. "I was bored so I came here and fell asleep?"

"I'm not lying to Lip. You can lie to him all you want but I'm not."

"You already did. Unless you've now told him but since he was awfully nice to me yesterday, I'm assuming he still doesn't know, does he?" River snaps. Ian wasn't one to ever push her buttons but they had a deal. River kept her end but Ian didn't keep his.

"Okay okay," Ian puts his hands up. "I'm sorry. Lip would know today and he'd be pissed I didn't tell him," Ian's voice comes down as he explains his reasoning.

"I know," River nods, knowing he was right. She isn't mad at him. She's mad at the world, something she's been mad at for a long time. The world seems to be a pretty shitty place and sometimes she takes it out on people. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Ian shrugs it off before grabbing his coat.

"Work?" River asks, hoping he'd say no and be able to hang out.

"Nope, Mickey's," Ian flashes a toothy grin.

"Have fun," River giggles.

When she found out about Ian and Mickey, she stood in shock for a good five minutes. She knew about Ian but Mickey was so unexpected. However, everything she's heard about the couple is good. For some fucked up reason River will never even try to understand, they're good for each other. The Milkovichs tend to be good for the Gallaghers, apparently.

"River?" Lip says as Ian squeezes past, looking back at River with wide eyes.

"Hey, Lip," River immediately moves her eyes to the table and hangs her head, back to noticing the throbbing that was happening instead her skull.

"What the  ** _fuck_**  happened?" Lip nearly yells, putting emphasis on 'fuck' as he always did when he was mad.

"Ran into a wall," River mumbles.

It was an unspoken kind of thing her, Lip, and Ian had. If they didn't want to explain, they'd say they ran into a wall, door, pole, anything. Lip once said he ran into a squirrel. Needless to say, he had a concussion.

"No. Fuck that. Who the fuck did it?" Lip raises his voice as he spits his words.

"Don't yell at me!" River yells back, standing up and slamming her hands on the table, making her head pound more.

"Tell me what the hell happened then," Lip brings his voice down but doesn't release any of his anger as he moves to her.

"Fuck's it matter, huh?" River grits her teeth.

"Because it fucking matters, damn it!" Lip grabs her arms, as if to shake an answer from her but all it does is inflict pain.

"For fuck's sake, leave shit alone! And let go!" She pushes against Lip's grasp as he loosens his grip, realizing he was hurting her even though his grasp really wasn't much.

"What is with the yelling? I can hear the two of you outside," Vee says as she walks in from behind River. Fiona must have told Vee to stop by.

"Someone's beating the fuck out of her and she won't let up!" Lip screams back, his grip already barely on her arms.

"Okay, you need to go. Go upstairs, outside. I don't care. Just go," Vee says as she stands between River and Lip.

The two never got violent with each other. Lip wasn't one to hit girls, ever, and River never hit him, no matter if he deserved it or not but sometimes they did get into yelling wars and someone would need to break them up. It was usually over a bullshit relationship that didn't matter in a week.

Lip puts his hands up and walks past them, slamming the door as he leaves. Guilt consumes River. The last thing she wants is Lip mad or upset over anything, let alone something that involves her. She hates seeing him that way.

Vee sits River down at the table as she hands her an ice pack with a few aspirin. Fiona definitely told Vee. River swallows the aspirin and places the ice pack on her eye. She hasn't looked at it since she was last at her house and she didn't plan on it. She knows it's bad just by how it feels and the lack of vision she had.

"Well, your cuts aren't too deep but it looks like you popped a blood vessel in your eye. Make sure you keep some ice on it, okay?" Vee's sweet, nursing voice fills the still hostile air. River just nods in response, desperately wanting to go back to bed and sleep off the hangover, injuries, and fight with Lip. "What happened?" Vee scrunches her forehead, making her concern more than obvious.

"I really don't want to talk about it," River shakes her head as her voice has become scratchy.

"What about you and Lip, you want to talk about that? You two have a lot going on. The last thing either of you need is to be fighting with each other," Vee was right and River knew it. The one thing River hated more than basically anything was swallowing her pride. She'd need to, though.

"He just, he has a lot going on," River sighs as she readjusts the ice pack. "I can handle myself. I don't want him in the middle. You know Lip."


	4. Mickey Milkovich

"He just, he has a lot going on," River sighs as she readjusts the ice pack. "I can handle myself. I don't want him in the middle. You know Lip."

"Yeah, but clearly you can't handle yourself by yourself with this."

 "No, I have been. Trust me, it's something I can handle," River skimps on the details.

If she was going to tell anyone about what was going on, the first person she'd need to tell is Ian. The logical choice would be Lip, however, River doesn't want to risk Lip getting hurt. Ian will listen to her and keep it to himself unless he's witnessing something. That's just how Ian is with her.

"I'm gonna go home and shower. I'll head to Mickey's after," River gives Vee a sincere smile to show she is actually going to talk to Ian about it.

"I'll hold you to that." Vee threatens with a smile.

The two say their goodbyes as Vee leaves the house. River goes back upstairs and grabs her clothes and shoes from Ian's room. The aspirin was starting to kick in just enough for River to be able to concentrate a little bit. It'd been months since she had a hangover this bad. It was the only downside to drinking.

She gets to her house and grabs new clothes. Ripped jeans, black zip-up hoodie, and a white SAIC shirt. It was her favorite season. The leaves were changing and she could be wearing a sweater one day and a tank top the next. Chicago weather is unpredictable in the fall and spring seasons. Most people hated it, but River loved it.

Showering was by far her best decision of the day. She no longer felt like she reeked of alcohol and she felt refreshed again. The headache was still there but it was tolerable. River's face was horribly sore but the warm water seemed to ease the ache enough.

This shower did allow her to think. No matter how bad her head was hurting, she couldn't stop her brain from thinking. She needed to think of exactly what to tell Ian without completely dragging him into the middle of everything. Anyone who knows what's really going on, is at risk of getting hurt. Her words needed to be careful and thought out. Then, there's the other side. At some point, she  _will_ need to tell Lip. Fear consumes her heart with the very thought. Lip won't be able to control himself. According to Ian, he's becoming a bit more of a loose canon. With the luck River has been dealt lately, Lip's likely to go after Jason himself and get himself killed. It's a lot.

Before leaving the house, River checks her phone to see if her parents have tried to get a hold of her but there was nothing. She knew they'd be calling by the end of the day but she could always call them back. River threw her phone back onto the couch before grabbing her backpack and cigarettes, leaving the house.

The walk to Mickey's was another refreshment. There was a staleness in the fall air. The wind hit River's sore face causing her to wince a few times but eventually getting used to it and embracing the coolness hitting her face. The ice pack Vee loaned her needed to be in the freezer and she didn't feel like taking it with her.

When River gets to Mickey's, she knocks quickly, knowing they'll yell or answer much quicker than the Gallaghers.

"River?" Mandy answers the door and the staleness quickly turns awkward.

"Uh hey, Mandy."

Mandy and River never had any problems but after finding out what Mandy did to Karen, River was a little uneasy. River hated Karen. She was a shitty person and even worse to Lip but hitting her with a car was, well, Mandy.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm cool. Ian still here?" River answers Mandy with a follow-up question, making sure not to be asked about her face one more time. She was on the verge of snapping.

"Oh, yeah. Come in," Mandy opens the door and allows River inside. "Mickey's room. Down the hall to the left."

"Thanks," River nods as she walks to the door.

She knocks on the door receiving a response from Mickey. "What the fuck do you want?"

"Answer the damn door, Milkovich," River smirks. Same old Mickey.

"Open," Mickey yells back.

River turns the knob and sees Mickey and Ian shirtless and sweaty. "Was I interrupting?" She gives them a disturbed look feeling the awkwardness travel into the room.

"No," Ian gives Mickey a sinister look, cocking his eyebrows before sliding his shirt over his head and looking back to River.

"I can come back. When you two aren't, uh...busy?" River teases the couple. It wouldn't be the first time she had walked in on a Gallagher having sex. It just kind of happened.

"No, what's up?" Ian asks, inviting River to sit between the two.

"Fuck happen to you?" Mickey says, throwing his shirt back over his head.

"That's what I'm here about," River rolls her eyes, annoyed she's almost being forced into talking about things.

"Who we killing?" Mickey answers, just as serious as River expects.

The Milkovichs didn't mess around. You should never be on their bad side. Lip got a nasty beating from the boys once and it was by far one of the worst ones Lip had ever received. Half of his face was swollen for weeks and that wasn't even for something  _Lip_  did to them. They were just after Ian and Ian was hiding from them. Lip was just their way of sending a message. Don't fuck with the Milkovichs.

"No one," River shakes her head as she takes a seat on the bed.

"Well?" Ian pushes.

"Look, I'm only saying something because Vee says I should and Lip and me had a blow up. So you do nothing. You tell Lip nothing. We have a cone of silence," River doesn't move her gaze from Ian's.

Mickey was nothing to worry about. Mickey wouldn't tell Lip, he doesn't have a reason to. The most he'd do is pressure Ian into telling Lip but Ian won't cave.

"Okay," Ian nods in agreement as the two of them wait to hear River's explanation.

"Alright, I got into some trouble. I'm not going into detail but this guy that I was dating, I told him we were over months ago. He just has something over me so he says we're still together and I act like it. If I don't, shit like this happens." River stays as vague as she possibly can. River is good at repressing memories and she likes it that way. She'd prefer not to relive her life on the Northside.

"You need to give me more than that," Ian shakes his head in disapproval.

"I just, I have something over him and he has something over me. And if I were to tell anyone, well, he'd rat me out and I can't afford for that to happen. Look, he has a tracker on my phone. I moved back because I miss it here, yes, but also because I assumed he'd never step foot over here. His dad is head of the college board and his uncle is chief of police. So, to make sure I don't rat him out, I have to pretend I'm dating him and he gets mad for fuck knows what reason. I do what he says and I keep my shit together."

"So your pretend boyfriend beats the shit outta ya? For fucks?" Mickey chimes in.

"Well, yesterday it was because I moved and didn't tell him and I was out. The tracker software on my phone is some weird ass coding I can't figure out. I don't want my parents to know. So, I'm stuck with it until I rid the software. I tried a factory reset and that did nothing. I don't get it. I'm not good with that stuff. I left my phone at my place last night and today."

"What's his name? I'm gonna beat some preppy boy ass," Mickey says with the cock of his eyebrows.

"Yeah, that's why I'm not saying anything. Look, I love this school. I'm not giving it up. I have three years left," River shakes her head, trying to explain her reasoning even though she knows it's horrible.

"You can go to another school, River," Ian tries reasoning with her but River isn't the easiest person to reason with.

"No. I don't want another school. I like this one. Look, if word gets out what happened, it's more than the school I'm risking and I can't let that happen. You wanted to know what's going on, so I told you."

"What are you gonna do?" Ian questions, his eyes filling with pain for his friend.

"Deal with it," River says shortly knowing her options were basically nonexistent.

"I'm telling Lip," Ian throws his hands in the air and gets up from the bed.

"Why?" River yells as she watches the confidence she held in Ian fade.

"Because, I'm not sitting around and watching you get the fuck beat out of you," Ian says before leaving Mickey's room, River right behind him.

"Ian!" River screams as she catches up to him, now leaving the house. "Please," River moves in front of him, begging him to not open his mouth. "Please, don't tell Lip."

"What the hell are you so afraid of? Because the River I know, isn't afraid of shit and doesn't have a problem getting Lip to help her. So what the fuck," Ian stands in the street, hands in his pockets, not budging on his decision.

"Because. It's Lip," River holds a straight face as she wiggles her eyebrows. Ian knowing exactly where her head was.

Ian lets out a loud sigh before he starts walking again. "You call me. He shows up, you call me. Deal?" Ian swallows his pride, not wanting to continue the argument. He knew better. River wasn't caving even if her life depended on it.

"Ian," River rolls her eyes as she catches up to him.

"Take it or leave it," Ian keeps his stare directly in front of him.

"Deal," River agrees reluctantly.     


End file.
